I've isolated the problem, it's mumble.
I ran through the settings and was able to fix it while there weren't multiple programs conflicting.
[EDIT] I started it up again, problem is still persisting.
w/e delete this thread.
So! I just bought the Logitech G430 headset. I was using just some 2.1 headphones for audio and a LifeCam HD-5000 for a mic, the headphones were plugged into the audio jack on my Logitech LS21.
Now I have the Logitech USB plugged into a CHA USB. It works.
I start up Teamspeak and the mic is...