when I load a cassette into my car ( 12 year old car) player it spins about 3 times and then ejects

[fumbles29]

when I load a cassette into my car ( 12 year old car) player it spins about 3 times and then ejects

 

[USAFRet]

when I load a cassette into my car ( 12 year old car) player it spins about 3 times and then ejects

If it happens with every tape, then something inside the player is worn out of tolerance. You could spend a significant amount of time trying to find and fix the problem. Or you could just get another cassette player.

If it happens with just one tape, then the tape is probably wound too tight.