Google Branded Sexist for Saying No to Cougars

Page 2 - Seeking answers? Join the Tom's Guide community: where nearly two million members share solutions and discuss the latest tech.
Status
Not open for further replies.
IMHO, it also can depend on a persons individual circumstances. If having children is a bad idea for them, for genetic reasons and such (such as with me, having MS as I do). Then dating an older woman isn't such a bad idea, such as they more likely wont have as much of a desire to have kids either, or more kids even if she already has helped raise a family earlier on.
 
Calling double standards in any debate is whiny, immature, and inevitably fails to win the hearts of anyone. Calling "double standards" in general is hypocritical because inexorably what comes around "will" go around. Calling "double standards" is just complaining because it come back around the way you wanted it to.

Example A: A man who carries condoms is responsible; A woman who carries condoms is a slut.
This is a disgustingly common double standards argument, but as I said, what goes around and comes around, and it comes around like this:
Example B: A man who cheats is a dirty scumbag. A woman who cheats is emotionally neglected, and the man should have put more effort into taking care of her needs.
Or even;
Example C: A man who beats his wife is a criminal with anger management problems; A woman who beats her husband is strong and independent, and her husband is a wimp anyway.
So as you can see, women being called sluts for carrying condoms comes back around in very efficient and convenient situations (situations that, in my opinion, are much stronger and more important, and have much further reaching consequences).
So calling "double standards" in any situation is just whining that the cosmos doesn't come back to pay said person off when and how they want it. Well, tough shit. Life isn't fair. But if people would open their eyes and take an optimistic view on life, rather than a pessimistic one, they'd see exactly what advantages come around to them.

P.S. To you cougars out there, the way it comes back around to you, after all the discrimination against cougars: A: Since you have experience and are taking action, it's a lot easier for you to get the guy. B: Since you're aiming for younger guys, it's a lot easier to get in their pants and there are no strings attached, and C: You have a much wider pool to select men from anyway, as men between the ages of 18 and 25 are generally some of the most sexual promiscuous animals on earth. You're targeting a pretty easy crowd there. So I'd say the advantages of being a cougar far outweigh the social setbacks.
 
[citation][nom]TA152H[/nom]Women will complain about how nature made them until time ends, but the reality is, it's normal for a man to be attracted to a younger woman, and far less common for the reverse. Dumb women claim double standards, and societal issues, etc... These idiots will eventually understand it is just the way nature made people, and complaining will not change it. It's basically instinctive.The reason is simple, women lose fertility much sooner, and more dramatically, whereas even 70 year old men can have kids. From a purely procreative aspect, a woman over 40 or so is essentially worthless, whereas a man can easily still reproduce and if he has wealth, or material possessions, can offer the female an excellent chance to have and raise children to adulthood. Because bearing a child is so much more difficult, women's fertility is of a much shorter duration, and their attractiveness fades with it.Now, some twit will say some men like older women, or so on and so forth. This is true, just as there are homosexuals who fall outside of the norm, and efficiency of reproduction. But, by and large, it is more normal for men to be attracted to younger women than the reverse. Fair or not, complain or not, it's just how it is. It's not even fair for women to whine to use about it, we can't help it. We're designed that way, and it's not so great for men either. It's a lot easier to get along with a 35 year old that has some idea what she wants, than a 20 year old. But, the 20 year old is instinctively more attractive.[/citation]


And the truth is we need more wars: From 10 men - 9 have to day during a war so the remaining man gets all the nine women :)
This will secure that the women always get the best men \the best genetic material\. The men get all the sex they need (from 10 women at least one will be willing to have sex).

That's all basically! That's how it works with the apes. That's how is it with the lions.
 
So... I went to Cougar Life to see what was so "family unfriendly" about it. The only thing that struck me was they label the men as "Cubs". I'm no Cougar specialist so perhaps this is the common language used, but I must admit it's somewhat disturbing. It gives an impression of underaged boys. If there was a website for men looking for young girls and calling them "Kittens" I'd label that as "family unfriendly" as well, and I'm also sure it'd come under a little more fire.

Now, with that small exception, I see no reason why this dating site should be treated any different than others. Change the wording, it definitely sends the wrong message upon first glance.
 
[citation][nom]TA152H[/nom]Women will complain about how nature made them until time ends...[/citation]

What you wrote isn't really relevant to the article, and offers a very limited and incomplete, not to mention sexist, point of view.

A) Many of the older men looking for younger women are probably not interested in having children with them (Though to be fair, that can probably be said about older women looking for younger men).

B) If you want to discuss biological drives and reasoning, well, while men are usually fertile til the day they die, sperm quality can degrade as they get older. These days, the financial benefit of older men for younger women is a result of a long lasting social inequality. Genetically speaking, many desirable traits can be double-edged swords. That's why given a choice, women might prefer a certain type of man as a biological father, while preferring another type to raise children with.

C) Family friendly normally implies something that is also appropriate for those under the age of 18. Usually dating sites are meant for adults only, so technically speaking non of those is "family friendly" in that regard. Dating sites don't necessarily aim for people getting married and having kids, and many of them are giving the full range of choices, for people looking to make new friends, casual sex, dating, marriage etc... So the whole discussion about reproduction is irrelevant.

Bottom line is that sites made specifically for older women/men looking for younger men/women (all adults of-course) should receive the same treatment. The only points against that are rooted in inequality and double standards that sadly still very much exist. And on that matter, inequality works both ways and as result this sucks for both women and men.

On a personal note, I don't think the usage of "cougar" is really flattering, but I did find Trueno07's double standard distinction amusing :)
 
[citation][nom]N19h7M4r3[/nom]"Men who like younger women: Creepy" depends on how young... i have 2 simple rules: 50 Kg or 3 inchs of boob, which ever comes first xD[/citation]

50Kg boobs?? - you da man!
 
[citation][nom]TA152H[/nom] This is true, just as there are homosexuals who fall outside of the norm, and efficiency of reproduction. [/citation]

I agree with everything you say except that line. Homosexuality is actually much more common in the animal world than previously believed, and may in fact result in an advantage.
The classic example is black swans. Often male/male pairing will steal nest's from females and the young raised by them have a much higher chance of survival to adulthood.
Similarly, female/female pairings in albatross (once considered an epitome of lifelong monogamous pairing)are now discovered to be significant in number, and function by having 1 female of the pair solicit a male in a "relationship" and the pair raising the egg together afterward. This allows females normally unable to attract the best mates, the chance to reproduce with them and still be able to raise chicks.

So basically, in situations of homosexuality found in nature, there is often a survival and evolutionary advantage to the behavior. Obviously, the applicability of these natural finding to human behavior is debatable.

 
[citation][nom]Trueno07[/nom]Woman who like younger men: CougarsMen who like younger women: Creepy[/citation]

Does that make it a triple-standard?
 
TA152H - I see you're too lazy to change the way you think about the status quo here. You seem to forget that women claiming double standards won their right to vote only 100 years ago. You seem to forget that one of the greatest leaders of African American civil rights was a woman who refused to think that sitting in the back of a bus was 'just the way it is'.

Men may be attracted to whoever or whatever for all the reasons you stated, but I don't see why you feel the need to rail against independent women who fight for their own rights and against double-standards. Do you feel threatened?

NewJohnny - your anthropological filter is pretty rose-colored if you think that explains everything. You forget to mention that during much of history people were bought and sold as little more than property. That women were beaten by their husbands without any avenue for justice or reprieve. If we continue to justify the present using the past, then no - we would hardly make any progress as a species.

Believe it or not, my historically-amnesiac contemporaries, a lot of progress has been made for humanity & human rights in the last century or two - and these good old days where women were subservient and didn't speak out for themselves and against the norm are gone. Prepare to be challenged.
 
am_inspire, there's a difference between human nature and societies conceived norms and rules.

It is human nature that you have to take dumps, sleep and have the urge to reproduce. It's societal conceived rules that govern whether people are allowed to sit on a bus or who votes.

Generally reproductive preferences are considered under the domain of the former, not the latter.

Application of civil rights views toward a lack of progress in reproductive preferences is about as silly as saying there's been a lack of progress on fixing the injustice of how often we have to take a dump.

 
banthracis - The only problem with the argument on the grounds of reproduction is that older men don't want younger women because "they are fertile". They want them because the perceive them as hot. The new thing. The argument also fails to ask why younger women want older men; or did you forget that part of the equation? It definitely not about reproduction. This is not about nature, it about sex and money. Most older men want younger women for sex, not kids... most younger women want much older men for money not sex. We are not talking about a 22 year old woman and a 32 year old or even 42 year old man. But some 22 year old woman with a 52 year old guy.. Money on her part, Sex on his. It has nothing to do with reproduction. This is not a slam on either the man or the woman, but a real view on what most of the relationships are about.

Cougars are no different. They are older women looking for good looking younger men. The young men who are with them are looking for money or some type of re-numeration. It just women finally decided to say what they want instead of keeping it hidden. Many women now have as much money, wealth and perceived power as men at a certain age and they decided they wanted a young thing too.

All this reproduction crap is a smoke screen. Men and women are equally ... both can be dirty old farts who want a nice young thing. Women just want the right to be lecherous as their older male contemporaries.

Google is being stupid and prudish.
 
gmcboot, the sex drive is by definition an aspect of human nature. The fact that human's have modified to distinguish between sex for reproduction and sex for pleasure is irrelevant, as the sex drive is behind both cases. No sex drive, people wouldn't be having sex for pleasure.

The same applies for factors in looking for mates. It is human nature to look for young attractive mates (for both sexes), as evolutionarily we are programmed to consider these individuals fitter mates. Hence the whole young=hot ideal.

Even if we're not looking to reproduce and it's just for "sex" we are still heavily influenced by these naturally evolved views.

As previously mentioned, this occurs predominantly in males because men are capable of reproduction to a later age, while female are no longer fertile past mid age. This naturally occurring phenomenon is what results in the evolutionary distinction in much older males seeking younger females as natural, but not the opposite (this wouldn't apply to say a mid 30's female and early 20's male though).

In species with female's remaining fertile (or just live) much longer, the opposite holds true (rare in mammals, but common amongst social insects). This isn't a human rights distinction, it's a natural one.

This isn't to say older women shouldn't be able to allowed find younger men (I like to think humanity uses our intelligent to move beyond being bound by our basic instincts), but to demonstrate that their is a valid evolutionary argument behind this seeming double standard.
 
Maybe Google needs to censor searches for "Cheetah" too, otherwise you might end up seeing pictures of a famous Golf Superstar.... 🙁 I sure don't want my kids seeing that!!
 
I think Google is right when judging this kind of dating site not family friendly. This should also me the same for the other way around. Men dating younger women is not really family friendly. Right, in some rare cases those kinds of relationships can lead to an healthy long couple life with children and such. But most of the time those relationships are purely sexual and don't last very long.

It is a bit hypocritical to say the attraction for a much younger or older person isn't some kind of kink, because it is. I'm not talking about a 5 years old range of difference here, but a 10 years old difference or more.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.