It sounds like you've got a firewall blocking all your connections - Windows firewall has exceptions built in for windows update and IE by default. Try adding more exceptions or just disabling the firewall.
Don't shut off Windows update! Updates are there for a reason, to fix things!
Don't use IE. Download Firefox and you'll never go back.
Also, Antivirus software is free, if you know where to get it. Google "AVG free" and you'll find software to your liking.