3rd gen would be the same socket as 3rd gen.
The 3210M is a socketed processor.
Yes, this should work with a QM 4-core processor - something like a 3630QM. Use good thermal paste - the cooler in the Dell may not be able to keep up with the 10w higher TDP of the QM processors, but most I've switched out cope fairly well.
Make sure that you check for any BIOS updates on Dell's site prior to removing the i5.